1) If you toot three times you have to go potty.
2) Flashing lights means you're in outer space.
3) Mac & Cheese is totally acceptable for breakfast.
4) You're not allowed to sing OR listen to music in the car. It's just not okay.
5) Car seats can double as a jet pack. Or space ship. Or train. Or airplane. Basically any motorized vehicle.
6) "Lasterday" is a word that designates a given day in a period of time spanning from the moment it's used until..well..the beginning of time.
7) Any child who has light brown skin automatically speaks Spanish. I learned this at McDonalds. It may or may not have offended two Asian individuals.
8) The word underwear is funny to everyone and should be screamed during public outings. If no one laughs, scream it again. This may be substituted with the word boogers, as well.
9) Kids, even in their naivety and immaturity, are wise beyond their years.