Nat-uh-lee: October 2009

Jeepers creepers; where'd you get those peepers?

I may or may not have taken some engagements :)

Here's a sneak peak. I can't post the masses of my favorite until they
narrow it down to the ones they're using. Then I'll post the rest.
And once invitations are sent out I'll post the ones they used.
I really liked they way they turned out.
Don't worry..we took over 700. Haha. Picked out about 70 that were usable
(you know..eyes open, looking the right way)
and here are TWO :]

That's all, folks.

HAPPY HALLOWEEN TOMORROW!

This post is a hot mess..

Random thought of the hour:
If I leave my gum under a table at a restaurant,
can I count that as charity?
I mean, I have good oral hygiene. Brush twice a day.
Thus, I'd be decreasing the probability that a three year-old
would pick a wad previously chomped on by a smoker.
Or booger-eater.
I'd even leave a little flavor.
Yeah??

WELP
Arizona grew a glacier. <--like a tumor
Yes, I am a self-announced geologist.
No, do not ask me what I got in geology.
I plead my case in saying my test scores were among the top 3
out of 350 kids..
My attendance, however..not so much.
Lesson of the day: Go to class, folks.
{Rather hypocritical of me, of all people, to say}

Hmm. It's FREEZING.

So the Halloweenie {yes, I just said weenie} costumes have been finalized.
No, you cannot know what they are//yet.
Yes, I will show you with pictures, come Saturday.
Hopefully they turn out. We're making them.
Domestication, at it's best..pray for me.

Legally unblonde

Natalie likes to set high goals.
She also likes to obtain them.
I am going to Harvard Law School.
Give me one point five years to prove that to you, mmkay?
(any LSAT advice, anyone?)
I missed my seminar with them today because I was busy
ditching stats to eat lunch with my mommy.
Where'd we go?
Oh you know..McDonalds. Go big, or go home.
McDonalds > Harvard
Well, when I'm craving grease, at least.

SICK.
^how I feel now.

What's one of YOUR big goals?

Dead in the membrane

So I thought I simply had a bad case of writer's block,
when I sat down to write my essay tonight. I'd like to touch on two things:

1) BAD idea to choose Anthropologie's website as a corporation web page to rhetorically
examine..I spent more time "examining" than writing--true story.
2) It's not just writer's block; it's brain block.

I think my brain died.
Black-flowers-casket kind of death.

Symptoms:
-Everytime i go to think, I just see an image of scrambled eggs.
-Headache. The no-my-head-is-not-an-accordian-please-stop-doing-that
kind of headache.
-My neck's sore. Does that count?

WebMD diagnosed me with a brain tumor. Again.

Looks like I have 3 months to live, folks.
Interweb-doctor said.
I've survived a grand total of 13 months past my last 3 death-dates
so perhaps fate will be in my luck again.

I can't make this stuff up, my brain's dead--remember?

x.X

AU CONTRARE!!

tali-tali-ban

The following letter is to a commenter on a post a few days ago;

I am Natalie W, and I approve this message.

---------------------------------------------

Dear Anonymous,

Yes, I am fully aware that we invaded Afghanistan

in 2001. In fact, I have devised my own foreign policy on the

issue, in entirety. Whether you meant to sound belittling

or simply informative, I know not. However, I

am well-educated on the form of politics and history of the last

few administrations (I'm only 19, I wasn't alive for all that good stuff prior..

still learning), thus I try to be a productive citizen

and make due with the accumulated knowledge.

I simply made reference to Afghanistan to emphasize the

attention my Halloween-costume-decision needed.

Not to naively state such decision was in the making.

Yep, self-centered. No, not ignorant.

Sorry, that was bothering me all day. Do come chat with me

about politics whenever you feel inspired, though.

I enjoy it, thoroughly. Also, I highhhhly recommend this

article from the NY Times, written by journalist David Rohde.

(This applies to everyone..he was taken and held hostage for 7 months while

reporting as a journalist in Afghanistan

before escaping and making it back to America).

Link found below.

Love,

Nat-uh-lee

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/10/18/world/asia/18hostage.html?_r=1&hp

oh haighh

So I have this piece of metal..some people call it a car.
I call it a time bomb, in essence that at any given moment it is going
to explode, and leave me on the side of the road in smithereens.
Meet..Jorge:

Don't get me wrong, Jorge and I have had lots of memories.
Bottoming out over speed bumps, jamming out to T-Swift, making three-hour journeys
up north...heck, he even holds two snowboards comfortably.
However, I lost confidence in Jorge one day when he died on me..in the middle of the road.
Really, died. Just shut off. As I was getting on the freeway.
Yeah, NOT COOL, bff!
So we took him to get fixed, and of course the old greasy guys
couldn't find the actual problem, but managed to rack up $1200 in other
"pressing issues of importance".
Hello, my blogging friends, let me introduce you to a grim reality in the auto-world:
if they say it's imminent, it's probably just to steal your money.
$1200 later, and my car runs worse than it did when I took it in initially.
Now explain that one to me.
---------------
Dear blog world,
Please pray for me as I embark on day-to-day
tasks of commuting around the state of Arizona.
Pray that I don't become simple remnants aside the
desert highways of A-to-the-Zona. Remnants of the House
of Jorge. Yeah yeah..I sure did.
<3, Natalie

The academy is..

So I have a big decision to make.
We're talking super super big.
Like "should we invade Afghanistan" big.

What in the Sam Hill am I going to be for Halloween?
Brie and I have brainstormed. And this is the list:
1) Book ends (tehe)
2) The Declaration of Independence: so what if I'm a wonk. Lay off.
3) The Commerce Clause (again, wonk).

I've already consulted my magic eight ball, phoned a friend, and called Dr. Phil.
But to no avail.

Please help me. Kthankss.

PS New layout. Yup. I made the banner. Lamespice? Probably.
But it matches. So lay off :]]

Big Little Things

I don't watch R-rated movies,

however I'm not naive to the world around me.

I'm not a political science major (anymore),
but I am a political-happenings nerd.

I don't like the way most others think,
yet 4 years of my college education will be spent studying it.

I hate the cold,
and love the snow.

I don't look like Demi Lovato,
but people tell me I do (I'd kill for her cheekbones..).

Pretty much, I'm one big contradiction,
looking and living for the butterflies found amidst it all.

Which attributes of yours contradict themselves?

YES you will do this :]

Finish the sentence.
It's a game.
I finish it on my bloggity blogster. And you do the same in my comment-majigger. Yes, I made this up. Yes I was throwing a temper-tantrum at the fact I got TWO whole blog comments last post. Yes, I am soon boycotting this whole "waste 93 hours of your life deciding what to say" if people don't start bustin' out the chit-chat. THAT'S RIGHT <3>

Gooooooood deaaaaal.

1) I am crazyrandom.
2) I lack creativity, these days. Where has all the inspiration gone..? GIVE IT BACK, motivation-sucker-outter. Kthanks.
3) I have this bad habit of overplaying my favorite song to the point of ultimate detestation.
4) I need to improve my blogging habits. Fah realz.
5) I look forward to halloween/thanksgiving/christmas/snowboarding <3
6) Don't you love it when you find time to somehow finish all you need to do?
7) My favorite place to go is the temple. With Cheesecake Factory as a close second. They better have on in the C-Kingdom.
8) I wish I were an airplane. So I could fly myself wherever I wanted to go. 'Cept then who would serve me apple juice and pretzels..? Could I hire my own flight attendants? o.O
9) It's annoying when people stop completely before making a right hand turn. I mean..seriously?
10) I prefer to [bake] my cake and eat it, too. That's right..the world according to Natalie (whoa, haaaiigh there new blog name. AHA).

Ready, set, go! Keep the blue part, change the black part :]

I'd rather have Burger King

My lack of creativity oftentimes leads to my "borrowing" it from someone else. For example, I have no cute clothes. My friends wear cute things. I want to wear cute things. I steal their cute things. Or throw together a make-shift array of something similar. They bake yummy things. I bake pretty things that look just as yummy but, in all reality,
taste not-so-yummy.

Speaking of not so yummy, my mum (I'm British now) and I went out for din-din. Just the two of us. You know, cute-style like Dr. Evil/Mini-Me. Something like that. But yeahhh, I can't remember the name of the place. All I know is it was asain. And they had good mints. But one thing stood out: no silverware. Not even the "artificial" asian restaurant..where they secretly hoard (spelling?) the silverware back where they make the fortune cookies. Or perhaps the waiter simply enjoyed watching me prod pieces of chicken around my plate with a chopstick. Yes, singular. It was disasterous.
And they didn't have dessert. Or fortune cookies.
Whattheheck?!
Anywho. Didn't finish my life-size meal. Took it home. I went to eat it approximately 31 minutes ago. And counting. However, I have an accusation to (wrongfully) make: They traded out my terryaki chicken ish for terryaki monkey. True story. I couldn't make this stuff up. It was so gross. So gross that I drenched it in soy sauce that I found hiding in the back of my refrigerator.
PS Natalie, you don't LIKE soy sauce.
Oh, for the love.

How did my stream-of-consciousness take me so perfectly from lack of creativity to clothes to food to sicknast asisan eatery? Well, I didn't know what to blog about, and my friend suggested gross leftovers. Which was just too fitting with my traumatizing occurance. Ta-da.

May the force be with you.

<3

Dear Santa,

My friend doesn't really like you. He says "Santa" is just "Satan" with a misplaced n. I, however, love your fat self. Sorry, phat*. With a ph. Not an f, definitely not an f. I mean, you are galaxies cooler than the easter bunny. Man-sized rabbit hopping around throwing candy at kids? Sounds a little sketch. And cupid? Put some clothes on before you get hit with a public indecency suit. I do believe, however, you have some contending to do with Phil Radford, executive director of Greenpeace. Arbor day is becoming an increasingly popular holiday. At Berkeley. Anywhom. Just thought I would show you some of the amazingness I would like from you this season.

1) this outfit from modcloth. Shoes also. Heeyyyyyyy!

2) Canon Zoom EF 28-200mm f/3.5-5.6 USM <3>

3) So vintage I love ittt.

4) The new Owl City CD

5) Photography talent

Thanks, St. Nick. You da, you da best.

Yours truly,
Natalie
Arizona, United States
3°39′54″N 114°13′15″W

Red flag means mail

Dear boy who sits behind me in class,

Nice hair cut, it looks good. My hair is finally longer than yours. Yay! Daz kewl. Now, could you please keep your barefeet off my desk? And quit caressing my purse with your toes? That would be Tony-the-Tiger greeeeaat!

Kindly,

The Girl who sits in front of you

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Rainbow Chip Frosting,

Why you gotta' be so good? Is it weird that I come after you with a spoon every night for dessert? Is it weird that I have dessert every night? Is it even more weird that I have about 4.2 desserts every night? Bring it on, diabetes.

Regretfully,

Natalie

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Statistics Professor,

It is apparent, from your zealous behavior, that you love love love statistics. Which is cool; I do too. But, quite frankly, your class puts me to zzzzz. That's z-score talk for sleep. With a mean of 0, and a standard deviation of 1. That's right--it's a normal distribution. Approximately.

Yours truly,

The Girl in the front row with her eyes wide shut

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Satan,

You are lamespice.

Love,

NATALIE <--does that intimidate you?

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear car-breaker-inners,

How are you enjoying my iTouch? Do you love the scriptures as much as I do? What about that church music..any favorite hymns, yet? Call me with your baptism date!

CTR,

Nat

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Chick Flick,

Can I watch you right now? A sappy love story, preferably. With lots of sappy love. Hence "sappy love story". Right?

Sappily,

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Blog Readers,

Holy moly. Why don't you comment?! I don't bite. I do, however, check my stats. And when the site reader is showing 70 page views a day and I have 3 comments..well that's just uber dumb. Come out, come out, wherever you are. :) New friends are da best. You da, you da besst.

Love,
Nat-uh-lee

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Yo Halloween, I'm really happy for you, and I'mma let you finish but..

Christmas is best holiday of all time. OF ALL TIME.

I died a little bit inside

I get discouraged a lot. The latest source of disgruntlement has been rather recent.

Recent = the last 23 minutes.

You see, last night, Sarah and I bought some cookie dough,

ice cream anda holographic ghost balloon..nbd.

As I was proceeding to check-out, my eyes

shot over to the "Fry's special": CUPCAKES. Individual, might I add*. Hello. To anyone

who knows me, they will testify of this Natalie-celestial-kingdom-on-earth sale. True story.

So of course, I bought myself a cup of heaven.

That's not even the important part.

Now that I have you intensely captivated, let me just tell you that I FORGOT about this little guy last night.

Which is just not my character--nope.

I usually have them babies' gone

before I get home. Sugar rarely survives it's 21 minute duration.

Nt = N0e − λt

That, above, is a half-life equation. Let me just say it 'aint got nothing on my sugar-intake

capabilities.

Okay, Natalie..back to the story. Right. So I'm in statistics this afternoon, dreaming

about being anywhere else

(seriously..that class makes Azkaban seem like Disneyland),

when it hits me: I had a marvelous work and a wonder awaiting my endulgances at home.

So, that salivating thought got me through stats, institute, the 40 minute drive home, and the dead bird my car and I encountered on the way (sorry, little guy..).

928 homework assignments later (and zero intelligence increase, mind you), I bolt into the

kitchen to feast upon my treat. My chocolate-cuppycake-with-white-frosting-and-oreos.

All mine. Om nom nom..

NOT!!!!

Whipped cream frosting?!?! Ew. Seriously?!

Worst way to end a day. Ever.

Epic fail *facepalm*

I am not happy.